Muffed Movies

Kat Evans iron-fists her way into the podchamber once again to discuss personality tests. Get scandalized by hip flexors, dongles, and jiggers!  Try to understand Kat's inexplicable and terrifying jack-in-the-box bit.  And then let us ruin Black Swan for you (though we've never seent it). Enjoy!

 

 

This episode is sponsored by Cards Against Humanity.

Direct download: 36d.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:24am CDT

Andy and Mark deliver a tour de force muffing of the iconic sci-fi horror film, Alien. Bounty hunters! Blowjies! And the rise of the dreaded dirt shark! Hold onto your ducks, because this is going to be a bumpy ride.

 

This is part one of a two-part episode. Ya hoid?

 

Muffed Movies is a fan production which celebrates film through parody. Alien is property of 20th Century Fox.

Direct download: MM9_pt._1.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:21pm CDT

Annelise Fabian defends her belief in ghosts against Dottore's relentless skepticism. Is there science behind specters? Who knows?! This episode is too full of rampage and rambunctiousness to pin down the truth on spooks. Join us as we enjoy song, swine, and salameters!

Direct download: 35g_COMP.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:02pm CDT

Andy and Mark soar like two adorable baby geese on the wings of comedy as they complete the tale of Top Gun. Reckless romance! Turncoat Soviets! Light necromancy! And finally Andy reveals the last refuge of a scoundrel...

This is part two of a two-part episode. (Twice the muffing, half the stuffing)

Muffed Movies is a fan production which celebrates film through parody. Top Gun is property of Paramount Pictures.

Direct download: MM8_pt_2.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:05pm CDT

Mark and Andy strap on their goggles and take to the skies while muffing the classic 1986 action film, Top Gun. Along the way they'll encounter a sentient Game Boy, mysterious wizards, and more baby birds than anyone expected!

This is part one of a two-part episode. (Too big to be enjoyed honey, mmm!)


Muffed Movies is a fan production which celebrates film through parody. Top Gun is property of Paramount Pictures.

Direct download: MM8_pt_1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:29pm CDT

Dottore interviews Chris Bashen (Nerd Outcast Podcast) about the intricacies of video games. Where did they come from? Why do we play them? And are they simply waking dreams, pyrric victories, if you will?

Also - falsetto singing! Rock smashing! And an uncharacteristically voyeuristic Podchamber!

 

This episode is sponsored by Cards Against Humanity.

Direct download: 34fj.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:36am CDT

Special guest Sophie Shrand joins Mark and Andy in muffing Peter Jackson's film adaptation of Tolkien's classic. Incognito party-Wraiths! Balrog Lando! And old-man Mark referencing Pearl Jam just often enough! 

This is a non-commercial fan production. The Fellowship of the Ring was written by J.R.R. Tolkein. Its film was distribued by New Line Cinema.

Direct download: MM7_FELLOWSHIP.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:46pm CDT

Kaye Straub, 2014 Champion of the Chicago League of Lady Arm Wrestlers, weighs in on religion, gender, and what's awesome about math. 

Plus: vampiric Mandel-Bits! Snatch-chats! And a special appearance by Macho Ma'am Candy Savage herself!

We may also talk briefly about fractals somewhere around the 24 minute mark as well.

Direct download: BPC_33_FRACTALS.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:00am CDT

Wedding bells are in the air in Gotham - but so is crime! Andy dons the mantle of Jack Nicholson and Mark gets fratty with Batty in this retelling of Mark's favorite childhood jam.  

This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Batman (the movie) is property of Warner Bros. Batman (the character) is property of DC Comics and was created by Bob Kane. Mark (the podcaster) loves Batman.

Direct download: Muffed_Movies_6.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 3:48pm CDT

Dottore celebrates Christmas with cavalcade of characters from the Muffed Movies podcast. Join them for festive songs, zany antics, and a call from an old friend. And for those of you that celebrate Cryptsmas, there's also quite a bit of bloodshed.

Special thanks to Andy North, Jared Latore, and the Alcohollywood podcast!

Direct download: XMS2014e_COMP.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 1:36pm CDT

Mark and Andy get chummy with the aquatic horror-thriller Jaws. Time-sharks! Gentlemen fisherman! Ink-dwarves! And a boatload of appologies to the folks Mark will likely upset (sorry people with New York accents)!

 

This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Jaws is property of Universal Studios Inc.

Direct download: MMf.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:57am CDT

OC Dweeb podcast's Sawyer Heppes endures Dottore's first biographically-focused episode. Hear probable anecdotes about the great Nikola Tesla! Experience the Podchamber and Balnaz's reinactment of the most shameful moment of the Current Wars! And dive into a sumptuous bath of podcast profanity! All this and an Ask Dottore question answered - Thanksgiving indeed!  

Direct download: BPC_32e.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:51pm CDT

Jared Latore from the Alcohollywood podcast returns to contemplate death itself. Will Pantalone sell his home-makeover reality show? Can Dottore remember the name of his ward? And what fell secrets lay within the turkey-jerky meat cellar? Find out on this audio journey into... The Schmilight Zone.

Direct download: BPC_31i.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 3:32pm CDT

In this special Halloween treat Mark and Andy unleash a chilling cavalcade of goons, ghoulies, and spiders! Can you survive this entire spooky episode without screaming in terror? Find out if you dare... Also, Mark says the c-word.

This episode is a noncommercial fan production. The SIlence of the Lambs is property of MGM and is based on the novel by Thomas Harris.

Direct download: MM4g.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 6:31pm CDT

Andy and Mark return to conclude their retelling of the Star Wars trilogy. This episode is packed to the gills with laughter, lunacy, and pimpful bits of grab-askin'. Blood! Speed! Adventure!

This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Star Wars is property of Disney Enterprises, Inc. 

Direct download: MM3.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:40am CDT

General Ironicus (that flagrant hyperbolist) returns with earthquakes and volcanos on his mind. This trenchful episode also features an unfortunate Lich, arcane videogame references, and the looming threat of death! Thanks for listening and donating! And please keep "giving it up for all the cyberpunks fighting for freedom everyday." - Snatcher

Direct download: 30b.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:12am CDT

Dottore is surprised by the condition of his Labroturtle. The Podchamber is all kissed-out. And Mark (that idiot roommate) shares updates about the next episodes of BPC and Muffed Movies.

Direct download: M8c.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 3:09pm CDT

Sophie Shrand confounds Dottore as they consider the science behind the adolescent mind. Tendon snaps! Neuroblasts! And more biddies than you can shake a red snake at. Yup, this episode's a real werk of shart.

Direct download: 29f_2_COMP_2.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:47am CDT

Andy North and Mark Soloff are at it again! In this episode of Muffed Movies, the boys act out Star Wars: Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back by memory. Dub-step robots, Tokyo-butt punches, and the raunchiest lightsabres this side of Cloud City! 

This is not an episode of Blastropodcast, but it's so hillarious you'll "hort hort hort" out loud. This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Star Wars is property of Disney Enterprises, Inc. 

Direct download: MM2d.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 1:58pm CDT

David Flora and Dave Stecco from the Blurry Photos podcast team up with Dottore to find and vanquish the fearsome wyvern from Castle Balordo! Also they tackle popular myths of Science (but mostly just laugh and nerd out about fun moments from podcasting). Dust off those mumply old honey-fingers, cause you're in for a serious milk-job!

Direct download: 28h.mp3
Category: -- posted at: 5:07pm CDT

A fresh haul of listener questions is read and answered by Dottore! Anti-matter explained! Sackesacks exposed! And finally a wine menu to pair with exotic animyules! Listen all the way to the end for a special treat! Ooooh yeeeeeah! 

Direct download: M7d.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:58pm CDT

Harshish Chitkara shares a jail-side chat with Dottore in the fantastical village of Eyemouth. They wax sociological, sexualogical, and sackelogical! Will these Men of Science escape the clutches of the Brotherhood of the Winking Tooth? Only if they can harness the power of the elusive Bumblegoose! Also - sorry Bulgaria. 

Direct download: BPC27j.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 1:14pm CDT

Mark Soloff and Andy North act out the second half of Star Wars: A New Hope.  Will Han Solo learn to care for other people? Will the Tie-Fighter Girls find peace? Will Al Capone's lightsaber-shooting spaceship silence our heroes forever? Find out in our thrilling conclusion!

This is not an episode of Blastropodcast, but it's frickin' great, so check it out. This is part 2 of a 2 part episode. This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Star Wars is property of Disney Enterprises, Inc. 

Direct download: Part_2.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 4:10pm CDT

With Dottore away from the apartment, idiot-roommate Mark Soloff and special guest Andy North decide to act out Star Wars: A New Hope in its entirety. Shit gets wacky. This is not an episode of Blastropodcast, but it is crazy as a mugg and you should listen to it. Drink every time someone says "suddenly". This is part 1 of a 2 part episode. This episode is a noncommercial fan production. Star Wars is property of Disney Enterprises, Inc.

Direct download: Part_1.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:52pm CDT

Geek Girl Chicago (Lauren Faits) seizes control of the bird-blood-powered Battle Van, Geekfully delaying Dottore's journey to Scotland. Learn about ghostly keys, revisit Dottore's arch-enemyuse Doctor Why, and discover the sobering answer to the question "Who ya gonna heil?" (spolers: nobody).

Direct download: BPC_26.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 1:20pm CDT

Dottore and the Podchambapp take a well-deserved break from their roadtrip to order some rude chow.

Direct download: M6b.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:29pm CDT

General Ironicus (chipandironicus.com) explains Evolution to Dottore during an unprecedented roadtrip to Scotland! Join these men of Science as they tackle unwelcome sports references, child brides, and gratuitous neck snapping! Harooki! 

Direct download: BPC_25i.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:25pm CDT

Dottore quenches burning questions, gets fearfully glandular, hawks an ionic bus to Ironicus, and solves a groovy paternity mystery.

Direct download: Microsode_5.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:31pm CDT

Planetary Defense Force's Andy North and Keith Hand get chummy with Dottore as they discuss their own friendship in this fast-and-loose episode. Also: Doge Balordo has wyvern problems, Dottore's ponce has a schmind of its own, and more end-of-episode bloopers than you should withstand! 

Direct download: BPC24i.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 12:23am CDT

Dottore and Balnaz recollect the origin of the first Microsode. When faced with criticism, Dottore refuses to let it go.

Direct download: M4e.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:01am CDT

Ele Matelan from Wildclaw Theatre spills the beans about blood! Knife strikes! Blood-sucking monsters! Scholarly ruminations on Science Fiction and Horror! And more crazy wordplay than a blender full of dictionaries.

Direct download: BPC23h.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 5:23pm CDT

Happy Valenswine's Day! This Microsode includes: Science News Headlines with Cool Dottore, an Ask Dottore segmyunte, and an upsetting call from Pantalone. Featuring friend of the show Jared Latore as Pantalone!

Direct download: M3e_from_drive.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 2:12pm CDT

Chris Bashen, host of the Nerd Outcast Podcast, stops by the podchamber to dish about cloning and actor-y stuff. What will Dottore do with Chris' stolen hair? How is Dottore like a sexy encyclopedia? And why hasn't wingman Mark left the Airbase? Find out now! Forever!

Direct download: 22d.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:34pm CDT

Dottore answers your questions, explains why Microsodes even, and indulges in some delicious foreskin cookies! 

Direct download: M2b_FINAL.wav
Category:general -- posted at: 7:51pm CDT

Our Fair City podcast creators Clayton Faits and Jeffrey Gardner are whisked away by Dottore on a romantically-motivated jernt to the Moon. Will the Yutu Rover become Dottore's new main squeeze? Will museums get sickly burned? Will Jeffrey feel a palpable discomfort with Dottore's oily sheen? Listen in to find out in this snappy episode! 

Direct download: BPC_21g.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:23am CDT

Dottore & friends stave off the winter blues by celebrating the nihilistic holiday Cryptsmas - mit song!

Direct download: M1_-_Cryptsmas.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 7:37am CDT

Kat Evans drops by for a chat about food, waste, and worms. Secret paddle-school origins! Swarms of spaceworms! And painfully awkward psychoanalysis of Dottore by an ersatz mother-figure! Why? Because it's Thanksgiving, you animal! 

Direct download: BPC_20c.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 5:58pm CDT

Dr. Thanh Thai lends medical credibility to this episode as he and Dottore candidly talk shop about mental illness.  Hungry to know why Dottore loathes hugs? Yearning to hear Dottore's open mic set?  Crazy for Justice? Look no further, you loveable crazy kook! Also, bonus swears at the end.

Direct download: BPC_19e.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:27pm CDT

Dave Stecco from the Blurry Photos podcast squares off against Dottore for some conversational combat! These scholarly chums explore Kung Fu, cryptids, and wailing on things in general. Need some hot new food-based lyrics to retrofit an old favorite movie theme? Look no further. Plus, some bonus puns - because you're worth it! 

Direct download: BPC_18j.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:01pm CDT

REWHAT? Technical buggery made the original episode 15 fly away forever. In its place, please enjoy a re-released version of 15 with a new gainful intro segmyunte! See kids? You'll barely miss Daddy now that Walter is staying over.

In this episode: Keith Hand embarks on a dangerous journey to the Red Planet with fellow butternaut, Dottore Balordo. How will they survive? Who will they discover? And what is Dottore's mysterious motive? All this and more menses jokes than anyone should endure! Far out, man!

Direct download: 15_Rerun_new_intro.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 4:26pm CDT

Viruses! Dr. Adam Soloff (a real-life SCIENTIST!) tolerates Dottore whilst explaining how viruses work. Peppered with nonsensical PSAs and fantastical commercials from Dottore’s podscape, this episode is bulging with hurtful satire! Also, comedy aside, please support the advancement of immunological research and science education - visit http://www.aai.org/ .

Direct download: BPC_17E.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 10:44am CDT

Annelise Fabian returns to be shrieked at by Dottore. Do they discuss cat balls, viking-transformation, and the evils of looking into Dottore's mouth? Of course! Do they discuss stars? Well, they tried.

Direct download: BPC_16.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:09pm CDT

The Semmerling family embraces Dottore, despite his protestations. Young Atticus teaches us the 3 types of kissing. Donna thinks barfing is a riot. And Jeff illuminates the joy of giving. Plus: Pope quotes! Leggones! And the tragic fate of Dottore's ex-wife. For more on the Semmerling's awesome Art, visit: http://www.insideoutarts.us/ .

Direct download: 14c.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 1:07pm CDT

Criminal mastermind Andy North swings by to teach Dottore a thing or two about babies. What's that, a blanket made of babies? Witch's milk? Confessions of buggery? All this and a special appearance by the infamous Baby Sucker. Noof!

Direct download: 13e.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 11:38am CDT

Claire & Ansel show Dottore how the sorsages are made by introducing him to the Renaissance, both real and staged. Treat your ears to tales of Irish decapitation! Mysterious black rocks! And consensual swordfighting! Word to your midwife.  

Direct download: BPC_12b.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:54am CDT

Annelise Fabian (self-proclaimed incorporeal meth-enthusiast and World's Best Wife) is berated by Dottore. Join them in the Schweinpod for a round of Bungeons and Raggons! Thrill as Canadians are tempted to end their lives! And ink yourself as phlegm makes our host sick to his scummikques!

Direct download: BPC_11c.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 8:23pm CDT

Leslie Nesbit sits down with Dottore for a hard-hitting look at Arachnids. Also: How many poops per week is normal? What causes face-pregnancy? And will Leslie escape from the miniscule menace of the "Widoe Spidoe"? Find out! Now with even less background music! 

Direct download: 10b.mp3
Category:Comedy -- posted at: 9:05pm CDT

Yogi Kat Evans shares her life experiences with Dottore & friends to school them about Yoga, Theatre, and Battle Beasts. The struggle for precious floor-food begins. Bones are lost. Hungry dinosaurs are remembered. And an unexpected cameo from gypsy-jazz musician Sophie! BAROOM!   

Direct download: 9H.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:09am CDT

Gamester Andy North teaches Dottore about Sleep. Sam Min-Man gets offended. And the War of the Brownloads cannot be unbegun!

Direct download: 8e.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:40am CDT

Jared Latore returns to assist Dottore in the first (and perhaps last) installment of Dottore's DIRECTORE'S COMMENTORE series. In this episode, the gents will view and comment on Stephen Spielberg's sci-fi classic Jurassic Park. Listen along while viewing the film at home for a scientific/comedic time-consuming experience!

Direct download: JP_COM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:36am CDT

Caitlin Watkins drops knowledge on Dottore about the Maya and what the end of their long count calendar means. Blood rituals? Check. Method Man? No doubt. Doctor Who references? A thousand times yes! And as a bonus treat, the first ten minutes of the recording are plagued with static! Because it's Christmas, that's why.

Direct download: BPC_ep_7f.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:25pm CDT

Chicago dell'Arte's Nick Freed helps Dottore to plumb the mysteries of black holes. Also: Who is Lucius McGoocius? Where is the Library Ghost? And what is the Secret of the Ooze? Find out in this Tale of Two `tores!

Direct download: 6f.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:28pm CDT

David Rheinstrom and Dottore knobble through space-time in their exploration of dinosaurs. Duckful censorship! Foreshortening! Smoking some Nexus! Also:Bratislava is not in Slovenia. 

Direct download: EPISODE_5.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:04pm CDT

Sebastian Orr joins Dottore in a firsthand exploration of Fear. Tornadoes! Zombies! Psycho-scare-apy? Plus more Star Trek analogies than you ever wanted to hear.

Direct download: 4i.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:39pm CDT

Tanya Thai McBride joins Dottore in an unintentionally songful exploration of deception, snakes, and gas-related heating. Dottore is hit with things. Listeners' questions are answered. And Balnaz the Kobold makes his debut.

Direct download: Blast_ep._3_FINAL.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:05pm CDT

Short n'sweet! The Schiles explain love to Dottore. Pantalone gets pranked. Questions are fielded. Plus the brokenest link to the epicest wedding video that nobody will ever get to see.

Direct download: BLAST_ep._2_Final_Draft.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:24pm CDT

Episode 1: Alcohol

Jared Latore helps Dottore understand alcohol. Wine, Werewolves, and Women are considered. Listeners' questions are answered. And the Curiosity Rover has closure issues.  

Direct download: EPISDOE_1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:44pm CDT